The Best Is Yet To Come.

I need a friend that I can actually talk to when I need to get things off of my chest.

…effort just seems like a waste of time.

Finding happiness isn’t as easy as knowing it. Sometimes being ourselves is harder then pretending, as odd as that might be. It’s such a scary feeling, being so far into your life and having no clue whats next, reflecting on how you got here and playing back distant memories. I just feel lost, like I should have more to look back on, and I should have more to be living for now. I’ve seen so many close friends come and go, and I wish I had someone that I could actually trust and relate to, but at this point I feel like that’s unlikely. Maybe I’m thinking too negative, but then again, maybe I have my reasons to…

and I really don’t like it.

=/

when you spend all day dwelling on something, letting it eat you up and thinking about it every second. You become a complete downer, and you decide that your day is ruined because this one thing that is in reality really insignificant, is constantly bringing you down, but then you find out something that makes you completely forget what you’ve been so upset about all along, if anything, your upset at yourself for being so selfish. Today I did something so selfish that when I realized it I literally started bawling my eyes out. I still feel bad, if I could just reset this entire day and wake up with a new attitude I would.

but that’s life I guess..